J. Jonah Jameson Jr. Sings A Song (Spider-Man: No Way Home Parody NO SPOILERS!)(ALBUM IS LIVE!)
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Here's the lyrics -
Jonah
Breaking news!
This just in!
Spidey’s a menace,
A damn demon!
Wherever there’s chaos,
You know he’s been,
The jigs up Spidey!
Give yourself in!
Breaking news!
This just in!
There’s been an attack!
And I bet it’s him!
Who’s to say,
That’s he’s not working,
With that ugly fellow,
The green goblin,
Ladies and gentlemen the story as we know,
There’s been two attacks by that green freak show,
Now we don’t have proof but I’ll go out on a limb,
The spiderman is likely in Cahoots with him!
Some say that the masked vigilante’s no threat,
But if that were true he’d take off the mask no sweat,
Instead he’s swinging round like a god damn pest,
Only way to catch a spiders with a glass on his head,
Not that I want the spider caught he sells!
Bugle papers sales are off the Richter scales!
But with headlines that pop well need some proper pictures!
Bring in that photographer, what’s his name? Peter peppers!?
Ok yeah yeah terrible, poor lightning,
Bad angle, I’ll give you 200 for all of them,
Take it or leave it!
Ok wait come back 300,
That's my final offer!
Breaking news!
This just in!
Spidey’s a menace,
A damn demon!
Wherever there’s chaos,
You know he’s been,
The jigs up Spidey!
Give yourself in!
Breaking news!
This just in!
There’s been an attack!
And I bet it’s him!
Who’s to say,
That’s he’s not working,
With that ugly fellow,
The green goblin,
Listen here squirt, your pics are ok,
But get him doing some sort of criminal activity,
All those swinging pictures they start to look the same,
Go do it or that Eddie brockensteiners getting paid,
Peter I don’t pay for your opinion, no!
I don’t care if you think that looney toons a hero,
You can take up any queries with Betty and go,
You know the goblin wanted Peter I told him hell no,
The power of the press, he gave up the dress,
Everybody immediately, out of my office,
I’ll try on the suit, well smack my caboose,
J. Jonah Jameson, this really suits you,
Citizens of New York City!
I don’t quite know how to tell you this!
But we have a breaking story unfolding before our very eyes!
Peter Parker, is spiderman!
Breaking news!
This just in!
Spidey’s a menace,
A damn demon!
Wherever there’s chaos,
You know he’s been,
The jigs up Spidey!
Give yourself in!
Breaking news!
This just in!
There’s been an attack!
And I bet it’s him!
Who’s to say,
That’s he’s not working,
With that ugly fellow,
The green goblin,
Multiple universes or something I don’t know,
But wait a minute, where’d all my hair go?
Ladies and gentlemen our beloved mysterio,
Was killed by spiderman and starks drones,
From midtown high school, his names Peter Parker,
He may well be just a kid, or an alien spider?
Who knows! All I know is he needs to face a jury,
And he shouldn’t be getting a Murdock lawyer for free!?
We the people need to rally and make sure he pays,
Well don’t throw bricks through his window that’s not okay,
In another life I knew a Parker he wasn’t too bad,
He sold his pics for money like an only fans,
Citizens of New York City!
I don’t quite know how to tell you this!
But we have a breaking story unfolding before our very eyes!
Peter Parker, is spiderman!
Breaking news!
This just in!
Spidey’s a menace,
A damn demon!
Wherever there’s chaos,
You know he’s been,
The jigs up Spidey!
Give yourself in!
Breaking news!
This just in!
There’s been an attack!
And I bet it’s him!
Who’s to say,
That’s he’s not working,
With that ugly fellow,
The green goblin,