i hate who i was before. || vent || read desc

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Published on ● Video Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7MmYDJcSmjo



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I need to finally address this.

I've been getting comments like the ones shown like "oh why did you change?" or "I miss the old you!"
the truth is I hate my old self. I hate my past self with every fragment of my mind.
I was a cringe and pathetic push over. I hate everything about my past self I wish I could just erase everything I was such a stuck up bitch I hate it

everytime someone brings up my past content or my past oc or ANYTHING of the sort I can physically feel my stomach turn. I hate the cringey persona I had.

I hate that people looked up to me. everything I made was awful??

every drawing, every video, every animation I made back in early 2023 and before I hate.
how people thought I was some amazingly talented person back then I have no idea
my content was SHIT.

back when my channel started to blow up, I only cared about posting videos every day EVERY DAY
And I started to burn myself out
only caring about quantity over quality

and everytime someone mentions it, it not only brings up memories of my cringey and pathetic attempts at videos and story writing but also when I was being bullied and mocked for making gacha videos

thats why I changed everything about my channel
my name. my description. my editing style. everything.
you might have even noticed that over half the videos I made are now gone permanently.
I don't want any sort of connection to my past it just hurts me to look back at my past self

I wasn't problematic, I wasnt a tracer or anything
I was just a cringe 11 year old who decided to start a YouTube channel

and even though I'm grateful for all the support I got
I wish my past self never existed

not to mention I also found out Im trans, and it hurts me when I remember the fact I was stuck in everyones perception of me. that Im a girl.

I hate my past self with a burning hatred

so please don't leave comments like this
it hurts me to know that despite the fact I want to leave that era of my life in the past where it belongs, people keep bringing it up and reminding me of it