HAN SOLO RAP by JT Music (feat. NerdOut) - "Never Tell Me the Odds"
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In between smuggling runs, Han Solo and his cohorts take a break at a cantina and things take a sour turn. Oh and it's all rapped.
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Lando Calrissian played by NemRaps of Nerdout ▶ http://jtmch.co/2rs20aw
Video Production ▶ https://wallabymedia.com/
Additional thanks to Blue Post Billiards, the 501st Legion, our awesome extras and our crew!
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HAN SOLO RAP by JT Music (feat. NerdOut) - "Never Tell Me the Odds"
LYRICS
Captain of the Millenium Falcon
Galactically unmatched with talent
My track records have been gettin’ around
I even, had a plaque up at Jabba’s Palace
A scoundrel you don’t wanna throw down with
I’ll navigate an asteroid field for the challenge
Even if I got a really bad feeling about it
She don’t look like much, she got it where it counts kid
It’ll cost if you want a ride
Half now and the rest on the other side
Point five past lightspeed on this flight
But no refunds if Alderaan is fried
Wonder why all my bars are tight?
Cuz I write raps while trapped in carbonite
Got the rhymes so hot like a tauntaun hide
The kind that’ll keep you warm on Hoth at night
Get on my side in a Chewbacca fight
If you wanna keep your arm sockets tight
Han, what’s wrong with the hyperdrive?
I promise, this doesn’t happen often guys
But I’ll improvise, I do not rehearse
Like when I smuggle all the money outta Jabba’s purse
Never hesitant to put my quickdraw to work
Greedo would agree with me - cuz I shot him first
Barkeep, sorry about the mess
Lost count of the bounties upon my head
Boba Fett said I owe a debt?
Too bad that the sarlaac got Boba-fed
Just heard that the Hutts are placing large bets
That I’ll make the kessel run in less than 12 parsecs
I don’t need the Force, just simple tricks and nonsense
So you can forget whatever rubbish Obi-Wan says
CHORUS
Got an asteroid field to get through?
Never tell me the odds
And a pretentious princess to rescue?
Never tell me the odds
If the job don’t pay, no can do
Better step up the cost
No clue what I’m doing but I’ll pretend to
Just never tell me the odds
LANDO
Straight outta Cloud City. Crazy young playa named Lando
Palpatine's little scheme's getting canceled
Anakin need to stop it, a softy
a Jedi in denial - an Obi-Wan Cannot Be
We're the aces. Run the galaxy
try to race, get spun back to Tatooine
I like my ship fast, like my milk blue
everything that you heard about me is true
Dont blame me, blame the lord of the Sith
loosen up Han, you're lookin a little stiff
Lando make the track go boom
Have you seen Jabba's behind? That's no moon.
Going undercover I'm playin a game of guess who
now that's Calrissian to the rescue
the Rebel Alliance, do this on the daily
bout to go down, better buckle up baby
Hey, I love alien girls of any size
when the clothes come off, it's always a surprise
one way or another I can always find the cookie
some smooth, some hairier than a wookiee
picture me rollin' in the Millennium Falcon
everything'll be fine, even given the outcome
let me take control, I know you like that
The entire empire get side-smacked if they try to strike back
CHORUS 2
When you get sent down the trash shoot
Never tell me the odds
After all the carbonite that I’ve slept through
Never tell me the odds
The cantina is our regular venue
Let me get you a shot
When I gamble with the men I’m in debt to
Just never tell me the odds
VERSE 3
Neck-deep in unsettled debt but I get by
Always on the run - you could say I let the debt flyyy
When you got a blaster, who needs a Jedi?
Even when I’m sick from hibernation I’m a deadeye
Hipfire, no scoping at all
Rebels got a problem, they know who to call
Me and Vader almost went toe-to-toe in a brawl
I knocked him into the stars like an opening crawl
Darth, me and you daughter are a pair
She got tight buns - and I’m not talking hair
Your son could use a hand, got one to spare?
He can bullseye womprats - but no one cares
I won the Falcon fair and square from Lando
In sabacc, cuz I got a good hand, bro
Sorry old buddy, want her back?
I’ll let ya borrow her, but not a scratch
Cuz this hunk of junk’s quick as a ship gets
So don’t diss her, your worshipfulness
I just flew us right out of a space slug tummy
So forgive a nerf-herder if he looks a bit scruffy
I was a smuggler - made a lotta money
Till a princess made rebel scum of me
Still pretty fly for a nice guy tho
Everybody loves you Han...I know
CHORUS 3
In every system I’m a criminal
Never tell me the odds
Still got promoted to a general
Never tell me the odds
Spying on the Empire, fly casual
And team up with Ewoks
When it comes to smoothtalkin’ I’m a natural
I don’t get cocky, but never tell me the odds