“Graham’d Up Nasty Crackin’ Back Anthem”
1“Graham’d Up Nasty (Crackin’ Back Anthem)”
Performed by: Bugsy, Rance, and The Groover
[Intro – Bugsy]
Yo, yo, yo—
Toast it up, but you better not ask me
What’s in this box, it’s Graham’d Up Nasty
It snaps, it pops, it claps back sassy
One bite, you sweatin’ like your name’s Lassie.
[Verse 1 – Bugsy]
Look, I bite in deep, that crunch so freaky
Taste so bold, got the marshmallow leaky
Chocolate drippin’, heat got me twitchin’
Whole snack stack feelin’ like a bad decision.
This ain’t just a cracker—it’s a scandal in foil
Got my harem sweatin’ and the fan base loyal.
Call it cursed, call it fine cuisine
But it’s the only cracker that’s rated NC-17.
[Hook – The Groover]
Uh-huh, this ain’t sweet, it’s mean and classy
Turn your taste buds into something nasty
Bite that edge, feel that blast, G
You just got slapped by Graham’d Up Nasty!
(Yeah!) Crack it slow, don’t eat too fast, B
It’s wild like my style—extra ghastly
If your s’more ain’t freaky, then you ain’t eatin’
‘Cause this cracker’s got your damn heart beatin’.
[Verse 2 – Rance]
Snap it, stack it, burn it if you dare
One bite and your shirt’s halfway in the air
Got abs on the box and a glare like steel
You don’t eat this snack—you make a deal.
Used to munch it in Puke World, roller coaster shame
Caught feelings off a cracker, ain’t that insane?
Chocolate spreadin’ like rumors on Main Street
Marshmallow moanin’ like the damn backseat.
[Bridge – The Groover (spoken slow, Johnny Bravo style)]
Mmm yeah baby…
That ain’t just crunch… that’s temptation.
That’s graham with a vengeance.
I licked the edge and saw my past decisions.
[Verse 3 – Bugsy & Rance (Back & Forth)]
Bugsy: Cracker so dirty, you need a safe word.
Rance: Got your senses flipped, vision blurred.
Bugsy: It’s not dessert, it’s a lifestyle choice.
Rance: S’mores got a bassline and a sultry voice.
Bugsy: Heatwave in a snack pack, soul off-track
Rance: Bite too hard, might get a flashback.
Both: You ain’t sippin’ tea—you’re sippin’ on pain.
Graham’d Up Nasty got a cult, not a name.
[Hook – The Groover (Repeat)]
This ain’t sweet, it’s mean and classy
Turn your taste buds into something nasty
Bite that edge, feel that blast, G
You just got slapped by Graham’d Up Nasty!
Crack it slow, don’t eat too fast, B
It’s wild like my style—extra ghastly
If your s’more ain’t freaky, then you ain’t eatin’
‘Cause this cracker’s got your damn heart beatin’.
[Outro – All Three]
Bugsy: We toasted it up, now you toasted too
Rance: This ain’t your grandma’s snack, it’s taboo
Groover: So next time you crave something wild and trashy…
Say it with your chest—
ALL: GRAHAM’D UP NASTY!!!
⸻