Trying to be better. [Part 2]
2I'm going to be following a series of orders I must follow in order to have a more societally stable life.
I lack stability in the real world due to the neglect of my physical body, the world around me, my heart, and so much more.
I've been in my head, contemplating so much that now I don't get excited about anything due to the fact that I'm always jumping around, and can't be unwaveringly devoted to a single thing that does initially excite me on the rare occasion.
The things I will be doing, on and off of these "Trying to get better" live streams, are all for the purpose of becoming less of a distracted robot who jumps around and thinks about the memes he watches on the internet and the existential dilemma of 'why' he does anything in the first place, and finally become more and more of a full-fledged human being, who is capable of seeing the world for the way it is.
[Episode 2 update: When it comes to the idea of purpose, I now know what I want right now with what I have around me to prompt it, and that's to enjoy my life as I become the literal BEST at everything that interests me. Right now, that's coding video games, but I also have many other things that I'm working on getting better at that I enjoy, like drawing, writing, and physical training. I will not be using this youtube channel in any way to promote any idea or belief, nor do I plan to inspire anyone through this. This is simply all just for myself and I think that having everything that I do as I become a full-fledged human being will be a fun chapter in my life as I slightly trick myself into believing that I have a community revolve around me. Even though that won't be the case and I won't be famous nor do I plan or want to, I will at least get a general sense of what it's like having eyes on me even though my real identity will be anonymous the whole time, which will feel pretty cool once I start studying in University after college to study a new subject, since I want to learn all things 'STEM'.]