YES, THAT IS A HIDDEN DOOR. NO, IT’S NOT FOR STORAGE.
11*How to Build a Sex Room* (2022) is one of those shows that feels like it started as a dare and somehow spiraled into a full-on Netflix series that nobody asked for—but you can’t stop watching anyway. It’s pitched as a “naughty home renovation show,” but let’s be real: it’s 70% awkward small talk, 20% confused carpenters installing bondage furniture, and 10% couples trying really hard not to look absolutely terrified when they see a Saint Andrew’s Cross in their freshly remodeled guest room.
Leading the charge is Melanie Rose, a perfectly posh British woman who looks like she should be judging floral arrangements at a village fair, not casually dropping terms like "flogger station" and "under-bed restraint system" without blinking. She floats through every consultation like some kind of kinky Mary Poppins, sipping tea while explaining where the hidden restraints will go—because apparently that's where home renovation TV is now.
The tone is the real star here, because it has no idea what it wants to be. One minute it’s shot like an HGTV show with soft lighting and emotional testimonials, and the next it’s revealing a custom-built spanking bench like it’s a new breakfast nook. The clients all act like this is totally normal—just another Tuesday—and you’re left sitting there wondering when the world shifted so hard that "hidden bondage compartments" became a bullet point on a design brief.
And let’s talk about those designs. Some are genuinely stylish. Others look like someone tried to build a Victoria’s Secret fitting room inside a Spirit Halloween. There’s no in-between. And the reveal moments? Half the time it’s a polite round of applause, half the time it’s thinly veiled panic as the realization hits: Oh God, my parents are definitely going to ask to see the house.
*How to Build a Sex Room* is trashy, ridiculous, unintentionally hilarious, and absolutely bingeable if you’re even remotely curious about what a "multi-purpose dungeon feature wall" looks like. It’s a fever dream of velvet curtains, awkward laughter, and design tips you’ll absolutely never admit you learned about on a weeknight. And honestly? Bless it for existing.
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