The Car Wash | Car Mechanic Simulator 2021 part 2
617I have rather (lather?) lead you to believe that this episode of Car Mechanic Simulator 2021 is all about the new car wash feature. It is not. Certainly, the car wash makes an appearance - I also do interior detailing, which is equally exciting - but there are mere asides to the main task of finding which rubber bushing you're supposed to replace. To save you some time, I figure out that you can get the time to tell you exactly which rubber bushing you're supposed to replace by the next episode. I know, it's disappointing as it's likely you'll miss out on further cool story bro anecdotes from my motoring history. You know what else? I should have put a fresh paragraph in here some time ago now, so you've got yourself a big wall of text that makes this much harder to read. Typical me however, I've opted to double down on the excessive paragraph length in order to make it longer still for what I would describe as comic effect, but others may refer to as flogging a dead horse. There's no accounting for taste, or indeed humour - the most subjective of art forms - but I think there's something in it and if I had time would now work to fill the entire description with one long paragraph. I am, sadly, pushed for time though and have other things to attend to. Other, lesser, YouTube mirthmongers would simply copy and paste what they'd already written but, seriously? You either commit to the bit or don't do it at all. That's what it's all about - doubling down on your investment in a line of humour you hope will pay off at some point. Arguably, the 2500 videos I've made so far are testimony to my commitment to the bit, if you take the bit in question to be that slightly erudite, slightly hairbrained, easy-going video action will be quite popular on the YouTube. I'd say 60k subs and 20M views would qualify as slightly popular but, y'know, I'd quite like to be more slightly popular so this process of investment continues. I digress. What I meant to say was there will be no further mentions of Rose Royce beyond the thumbnail to this video. This is both a good and a bad thing. I reckon I could have got away with the opening bar and that'd be enough. Right, I'm off. See you in the secret of the day.
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Behold! While some may describe this section of the video as the link graveyard, I offer you treasures, delights and mischief. This section of the description rarely changes, except when it does (*).
Okay, that's a total lie, it's a link graveyard. It is however delivered with the kind of panache you have come to expect.
Why is any of this interesting? Because I try to make the nonsense that occurs behind each of these links worth your while. You can trust me. No reason is offered why you can trust me, just know that you can.
Let's do the commercial gubbins first. Anything you procure from the below will help out the channel, although I might spend some of the kickbacks I get on "projects". If any of these projects see the light of day, you'll be the first to know.
Would you like a personal video? Maybe you fancy sponsoring the outro, sending a birthday message, life tips or buying a video? Get yourself to the Wisio! https://www.wisio.com/Colonel_Failure
Perchance you would care for some merchandise? Only the very best will do for the Colonel's table! https://freshmerch.fm/collections/colonel-failure
If you'd like to support the channel and get some rather magical bonus videos, access to the lunacy of the Discord channel and more offers to play games than sticks should be shaken at. More importantly you'll be part of the last emergency service - The Fail Brigade. Zesty! Two ways to get with the program-
Option 1 (several different tiers available): Patreon - http://patreon.com/colonelfailure
Option 2 (one size-fits all): YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/colonelfailure/join
Last but not least, if you want to know my current "rig" (that's what we young people call it) consists of visit the ole Amazon storefront where I will tempt you with things, all of which I do not regret using my own personal pocket money on: https://www.amazon.co.uk/shop/colonelfailure
Let us move on from tales of commerce to things more fun-loving.
Do you want to follow a Twitter account that is actually cheerful? Not in the kind of way that offers life-affirming, inspirational text with a waterfall in the background, but in a jolly, acerbic kind of way? Follow me on Twitter. That's what I do. I almost never shill my latest video entertainment. http://twitter.com/cnlfailure
Do you want to know what videos are coming up each week? A few people do. I don't always get around to publishing the schedule, but when I do, I do it on Facebook. Not sure why I chose Facebook, but there you are. http://facebook.com/cnlfailure
Okay, you've made it. You clicked at least two links, now get your reward.
(*) - Today's secret: So, these descriptions allow you to use up to 5000 characters to get your point across. My standard blurb uses quite a few
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Colonel Failure presently has 127,150 views for Car Mechanic Simulator 2021 across 11 videos, with his channel uploading 6 hours worth of Car Mechanic Simulator 2021 videos. This makes up less than 0.29% of the total overall content on Colonel Failure's YouTube channel.