Duration: 1:16

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9

"I was trying to connect."
......
As one who constantly fails to keep her relationships stable, this song hits way too hard. I've never been in love before, but had recently just learned that if I'm ever going to date anyone, I'll literally be the asshole who hurts my significant other based on my past experiences with keeping friendship alone. There are times where I'm fully aware of my own selfishness and cold distancing, but can't help repeating that same mistake all over again. I've develop these doubts for future relationships and couldn't stop imagining them ending on a bad note. Hence the reason why I don't really wanna keep anybody close. Either I'll break their heart or they'll break mine. Most likely the first, though.

-- I dunno. I wasn't in a bad mood or anything while I was making this, but a little self-reflection made me want to write it all down. Looking at Edward Hopper's painting does evoke some sort of melancholia, I'll admit. Feel free to berate me on this. Whatever pessimism I'm venting out here. I just wanted to potray what the form of my biggest demon look like: Disconnection.

App: Sony vegas pro 15
Song: Attention - Wyatt
Fandom: Ask me
Coloring: Alessa belikov