Duration: 0:59

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16

This video was originally created by John Szczepaniak but I added a few embellishments. You can find his channel at: https://www.youtube.com/@Sketcz

This is a parody of a parody and is not monetized. The music is from the movie The Shawshank Redemption and the photos were used in @Sketcz original video (cited below). Celebrity voices impersonated with MAJOR thanks to the "FakeYou" app.

Videos:
"Game store employee talking to Customer" from @TheRealDealKhaleel
"The Shawshank Redemption (1994) REFERENCE Full Movie Master" from @WarnerBrosPictures

Music:
"The Shawshank Redemption Soundtrack - Brooks Was Here" from @TheAmbientScore
"The Shawshank Redemption Soundtrack - So Was Red" from @The @TheAmbientScore

Photos:
- Lan party Book by Thames & Hudson:
https://thamesandhudson.com/lan-party...
- Reddit 90s Nostalgia sub
- Facebook CRT group
- Random Googling
- A couple of photos are mine

Original Script:
Dear fellas, I can't believe how fast things move on the outside.
I tried to play some games and looked for a rental store, but I'm told they don't do those anymore. So I tried to buy one, and the clerk asked me if I wanted store-exclusive DLC or something called a seasoned pass? I saw add-on packs when I was a kid, but now they're everywhere. And they don't come in boxes, you have to download them on day one.
At home, the system said it needed an update, so I waited for an hour. And then the game needed a patch, so I waited another hour. Then it asked me for an in-game purchase, which didn't make sense because I thought I had already purchased the game.
Mostly the kids don't even play, they watch someone else doing it, on Twitch-tok? The games don't feel like they did, and I can't relate to the stories.
I thought I'd take a memory card to my friend Dave, as we did back in the day. But now they say it's on the cloud? I remember Dave went on to make games. Speaking of which turns out Dave got laid off due to the economy; he was homeless and I couldn't find him.
I try to keep up, but my chest hurts most of the time.
I went to buy a games magazine to understand things, but they don't really do those anymore. Not like they did. Everything is on the web now - which I thought I knew. So I signed up to a forum. I don't think the moderators like me much - they use strange new words and everyone argues. There were forum arguments in the 90s, but now they use a thing called a tweeter to get you fired?
I guess I'm too old for that sort of nonsense anymore. I don't like it here.
I'm tired of feeling left out all the time. Like the world has left me behind. Of things I once enjoyed being gone.
I've decided not to stay. I doubt they'll kick up any fuss. Not for an old gamer like me.