#1072 Mortal Kombat Trilogy (game.com) Hidden Characters (1/2): Noob Saibot playthrough.
0I was reminded of this game recently and thought it would be fun to cover for a joke. I mean, I’m just so surprised it even exists.
If you thought the N64 version of MKT was a bit of a downgrade, the game.com port takes it to a whole new level. This bastardisation was released for Tiger Electronic’s failed handheld in the latter 90s and, like most handheld versions of an MK title, is just godawful. But it has two hidden characters, so we’re covering it.
The game.com was Tiger’s attempt at moving into the more legit handheld market. For years before this they made popular LCD handhelds based on big licenses, including one on the first Mortal Kombat game as well as Street Fighter II. The game.com (pronounced game com, despite the spelling) was their bizarre venture to try and steal some of the handheld market from Nintendo, a move which Sega and Atari had tried prior with the Game Gear and Lynx respectively, and Tiger likewise would fail in their endeavours, with only a handful of awful games being released before the thing was unsurprisingly discontinued.
MKT for the game com is pretty much one of the worst ports in existence. It is slow. It has no music. It barely has any characters. Those characters barely have any moves. Each character does have a brutality, a fatality, and friendship and a babality however, but these are so choppy that they’re not exactly impressive. I mean, look at Noob’s one in this video; nothing happens!
Attacks barely connect, barely deal any damage, and although there is supposedly a combo system in this game I couldn’t get it to work for it. It’s redundant anyway, because special moves rule the roost here. I guess because they released how shitty and unplayable this version was, they decided to make special moves take off a quarter of the opponent’s health. Given how easy it is to use these, and so difficult to land other hits, it means that there is basically no point to doing anything in the game other than spamming projectiles, which in particular makes sense when you get to the bosses of the game. You see, killing you in four hits was kind of the forte of Shao Kahn and Motaro so. So, what did they do to rectify this? Well, Motaro now kills you in three hits, and Kahn kills you in two. Amazing. Balanced as hell, eat your heart out Jeff Kaplan, competitive game of the year, all years, until the end of time. Seriously, they kill you in two hits. I think Kahn’s rising shoulder charge even hits you multiple times, so it kills you in one hit. This is beyond batshit, but I’d expect nothing less from a game com port of an MK title.
MKT for the game.com is a travesty of a title. A total abomination. And yet, I just love that it exists. It’s awful, terrible, totally irredeemable, but I just adore it for the ugly, pointless thing that it is. It’s so terrible that you have to gawk and stare at it like any wonderfully terrible game, like Superman 64 or Atari 2600 ET. Look at Noob’s teleport slam here, where he descends from the sky like an angel and delivers a single punch to the opponent. Look at his smoke ball which now does damage, because they didn’t know how to implement stun moves into the game. Listen to the deafening silence as if the game itself is imploring you just to give up, and is wholly apathetic to your presence. It’s terrible, but goddamn if it isn’t hilarious.
Next up, the other hidden character of this game.
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