IS IT WORTH IT?! | A Review of Pets No More in About 3 Minutes!
47A detailed review of Pets No More in under 3 minutes. :) We make game reviews, without the fluff... Is it worth buying in 2022?
Pets No More isn’t the type of game I’d normally play and to be totally honest and I’m not even sure what type of game it is or who would want to play it or how I’m going to get this video even remotely close to 3 minutes.
Either way I got given a key for free from the developer and it’s coming out on the 26th of July so it feels nice to be reviewing a game before it’s released for a change instead of 3 years after.
The best way I can describe Pets No More is basically like air hockey where you control a cute little cartoon zombie animal from above and you have to punch a fast moving puck with a pair of boxing gloves to try and get it in the other teams goal.
The art style’s quite nice and the animals and even the animations, despite being a bit basic, actually look pretty good, but unfortunately that’s about the only positive thing I have to say about it.
You can play as 1 of 6 different animals, each with their own unique ability which flashes up with a dramatic anime style special move followed usually by the puck doing a little anti-climactic wobble if it does anything at all.
There’s 6 different arenas too which you go through one by one as you progress through the very short but still frustratingly difficulty arcade mode where you’re put up against 1 or sometimes 2 AI at the same time, who can perfectly track the puck and wack it back to my side of the arena before my little human brain could regain consciousness and figure out where the puck even went as the camera gets thrown around wildly.
If you prefer multiplayer though you’re in luck as the game supports up to 4 players in local multiplayer matches but even though it’s intended as a party game I don’t think your friends will forgive you for making them play it, even if you did have 4 different controllers and enough room to huddle around the PC to make it possible, and I’d definitely recommend having some aspirin on standby to cure the headache that inevitably follows.
Another weird design choice is that the camera’s locked onto the puck which makes the screen bounce all over the place as the puck gets faster and faster as it ricochets off walls and other objects going from one side of the arena to the other and it didn’t take long for it to start giving me a headache.
The controls felt clunky and unrewarding from the very start and even navigating the menu with a gamepad felt like a challenge. It also feels like there’s a bit of input lag which really doesn’t help in such a fast paced game. On top of that no matter how hard I looked I couldn’t find an exit button in the main menu and eventually had to Ctrl-alt-delete to escape the nightmare.
It feels like it would be much more suited to a mobile platform rather than trying to be a fully fledged PC game, and with a couple of simple tweaks like a camera that’s fixed in place slightly higher up so you can see the whole arena, aswell as more responsive controls that actually carry out an action when you ask it to, it might actually make it quite fun but as it is right now it’s too clunky and basic and we don’t recommend it.
Either way it’s available on Steam from July 26th and I didn’t get any info about how much it’ll be when it comes out but I got my copy for free and can’t recommend it for that price so take from that what you will.
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