Relationship Dysfunction and BPD - Tendency for Dependency Part 1 of 2
2,425Pre-order my latest BPD workbook at: https://goo.gl/LQEgy1
I apologize for the background of noise of kids playing. My neighbors were in their backyard with their kids and I was hoping it would not come through. Risk of filming outside.
It is not uncommon for individuals with BPD to feel as though they need to be in a relationship to feel complete and whole, and to exist. Learning about this tendency for dependency and the related patterns can help you see yourself and your relationships differently. The goal of these videos is to help you re-conceptualize how you see yourself as a whole person, but also how you see who you are in your relationships. Wanting to be in a relationship is great, needing to be in one is frightening and triggering. Knowing your patterns and underlying forces can help you do your relationships differently, in an adaptive a healthy way.
Individuals with BPD have difficulty tolerating aloneness, as well as an intense fear of loss, abandonment, or rejection by significant others, and an urgent need for contact with significant others when stressed or distressed, accompanied sometimes by highly submissive, subservient behavior. This tends to lead to trouble.
The 3 interpersonal patterns covered in this video are:
1) An unconscious wish to be hurt, combined with the absence of a wish to help others is partly compatible with the idea of a punitive parent mode in which the individual has internalized the parent who devalued and rejected the individual in childhood. You act to your detriment to please this parent ideal inside of you. “My misery if your command”.
2) A wish to be good and do the right thing combined with feelings of shame for not being “good enough”. BPD individuals see themselves as defective, bad, unwanted, inferior, or invalid or that they are unlovable to significant others if exposed as having flaws and failures.
3) Receptive interaction. Individuals with BPD wanted to be opened up to, have their partner express feelings, thoughts, and concerns and felt happy and satisfied when this occurred.
Daniel J. Fox, Ph.D., is a licensed psychologist in Texas, international speaker, and award winning author. He has been specializing in the treatment and assessment of individuals with personality disorders for over 15 years in the state and federal prison system, universities, and in private practice. His specialty areas include personality disorders, ethics, burnout prevention, and emotional intelligence.
He has published several articles in these areas and is the author of:
The Borderline Personality Disorder Workbook: An Integrative Program to Understand and Manage Your BPD. Available May 1, 2019, but you can pre-order it now at: https://goo.gl/LQEgy1
Antisocial, Borderline, Narcissistic and Histrionic Workbook: Treatment Strategies for Cluster B Personality Disorders (IPBA Benjamin Franklin Gold Award Winner): https://goo.gl/BLRkFy
Narcissistic Personality Disorder Toolbox: 55 Practical Treatment Techniques for Clients, Their Parents & Their Children: https://goo.gl/sZYhym
The Clinician’s Guide to Diagnosis and Treatment of Personality Disorders: https://goo.gl/ZAVe9v
Dr. Fox has given numerous workshops and seminars on ethics and personality disorders, personality disorders and crime, treatment solutions for treating clients along the antisocial, borderline, narcissistic, and histrionic personality spectrum, emotional intelligence, managing mental health within the prison system, and others. Dr. Fox maintains a website of various treatment interventions focused on working with and attenuating the symptomatology related to individuals along the antisocial, borderline, narcissistic, and histrionic personality spectrum (www.drdfox.com).
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/DrDanielFox
Dr. Fox’s website: http://www.drdfox.com/
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LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drdfox/
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Amazon Author’s Page: amazon.com/author/drfox
Thank you for your attention and I hope you enjoy my videos and find them helpful and subscribe. I always welcome topic suggestions and comments.
Citation:
Drapeau, Martin & Perry, John & Körner, Annett. (2012). Interpersonal Patterns in Borderline Personality Disorder. Journal of Personality Disorders, 26: 583-92.