Category:

Vlog

Duration: 27:43

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This video does not do nearly enough but I wanted to sit down and be honestl with myself and apologize for all the wrong that I have done to someone who only showed love for me no matter what. There are no excuses for anything that I have done in the relationship and the past months.

Posting this will allow me to move forward for real. I need to look at myself and understand that I did a lot of wrong that shouldn't have ever been done and learn from it and be better.

I truly wish for your happiness and I am truly sorry for everything.

and I am sorry to everyone who was affected by my ugly attitude and negative mind.

Edit: Day after uploading this.
I keep thinking about a lot of things that I didn't even say but it all relates to many many situations where I acted so wrong and mistreated someone who was only trying to do her best for me.

I'm sorry for the carwash incident, I'm sorry for the candle incident (which was so stupid of me to get upset over that), I'm sorry for not being open minded, I'm sorry for not talking about my problems and being quiet all the time and never communicating when I needed to, I'm sorry for trashing your favorite anime, I'm sorry for not putting in the effort to think about what we could do as a couple, I'm sorry for leaving you in the car and trash in your car and texting you horrible things for no reason at all, I'm sorry for taking advantage of you and thinking that you'd come back and talk things out.

You treated me incredibly well and I made things so unbelievably difficult. You are amazing for sticking with me for so long after all that. you gave me so many chances it's insane how many chances I was given to realize what I was doing and what I needed to do. I know that nothing I can do or say will ever make up for what ive done but I needed to make this video to put out a good note to everything that has happened and my thoughts about you for so long. I will always remember you. you are a life lesson that will impact me and make me do better and be better.

Thank you so much for everything you have done for me, Holly. Thank you to everyone else who helped me as well. I'm sorry to all that I've mistreated.

I wish you the best life with your partner, I hope you enjoy your new ride, I hope that you and rae can be pump it up masters

I don't expect anything from this or to magical fix everything but I felt it in my soul to put this out after everything that I've done. Also I am coming out of this with a positive mindset, while thinking about what ive done and how I've treat you and others is hurtful to me, I will not let that take me down but I want to let myself know what I've done and learn from it. This isn't a video to get any sympathy or anything like that. I understand what I have done and I will move on with a full positive mindset but you will be in my mind because no matter what, you are a very important part in my life.