Toxic Crusaders (NES) Playthrough
186A playthrough of Bandai's 1992 license-based beat 'em up game for the NES, Toxic Crusaders.
Toxic Crusaders was a cartoon that attempted to repackage The Toxic Avenger, Troma's ultra violent 1980s B-movie icon, as a family-friendly eco-warrior who could sell mountains of toys.
Cartoon Toxie, who was basically Captain Planet turned into horribly disfigured Ninja Turtle, only lasted for a single thirteen-episode season, but for as brief as his stint in the spotlight was, he got around. Between 1991-1992, he headlined two comic book series, three video games, a line-up of Playmates action figures, and a set of Topps trading cards. Not bad for a lump of moldy mashed potatoes with a sagging eye.
Toxie's NES game, created for Bandai by TOSE, is a belt-scrolling beat 'em up that unabashedly cribs most of its ideas from Konami's Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Arcade Game ( • Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The ... ). It has a sewer and skateboarding stages, an awkward-to-use heavy attack that'll wipe out most enemies in a single hit, and you fight a giant machine on treads before facing off against purple Shredder.
It's not nearly as good as the TMNT beat 'em ups, but most of the time, it plays well enough to get the job done. The fighting consists of little but punching or swinging your mop (which weakens every time you eat a hit!) and making sure that you're never horizontally lined up with enemies for more than a split-second. The game becomes fairly easy after you've figured out the simple attack patterns, but the bosses are a real test of patience thanks to the lousy collision detection, not to mention how difficult it is to reach the select button for the strong attack. (That submarine boss sucks so much!)
The graphics aren't anything special for a 1992 NES release, but the garish colors suit the cartoon characters, the cutscenes are nicely drawn, and the game has a fun sense of humor.
Toxic Crusaders is neither great nor terrible. As far as licensed-based Nintendo games go, it's a firm C-lister. Batman and TMNT crush it under their heels, but Home Alone and Peter Pan could only dream of being so competently mediocre.
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