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Encouraged by the success of Ford Prefect paying off his gambling debts by raiding the Mines of Magrathea, Zaphod Beeblebrox wants a piece of the action. However, the Magratheans are now wise to the threat of wandering degenerates swiping their riches while they sleep, and have beefed up their defences to the point where landing on Magrathea is somewhere close to impossible, even for those equipped with an Infinite Improbability Drive to turn missiles into a strangely-sentient bowl of petunias and a sperm whale.

Zaphod's attention turned to the desolate desert planet of Kakrafoon, which has yet to be accidentally terraformed by a well-timed Disaster Area gig. The telepathic Belcerebon people who live there, forced to constantly natter about anything and everything that crossed their minds lest they read their neighbours' less-than-complimentary thoughts about each other (they should have seen what the humans did with social media in the 2010s and 2020s...), have let it slip over the Sub-Etha Network that their planet is heaving with precious gems.

Zaphod being the totally awesome guy he is, has decided it would be a really hoopy idea to help them dig through the sand and retrieve a handful of those gems, particularly the really shiny ones.

In this game, as is as much of a surprise as the last one (i.e. not at all, especially if you've read all this waffle from the top), you control Zaphod Beeblebrox in his quest to separate the Belcerebons from the sparkly stones hiding in great plenty beneath the surface of their arid homeworld.

Zaphod is motivated purely by greed, and as such he can (and most likely will) raid as many caverns as he wants, returning only to the Heart Of Gold when he thinks he has enough to satisfy his apparently limitless ego. Hence, there is no defined end to the game - it is your job to rein him in and leave Kakrafoon before it costs him his life.

Knowing their error in telepathically broadcasting their wealth to the ears of the Universe, the Belcerebons have planted Magrathean disappearing mines in their caverns, the number of which varies according to the difficulty level. But there is a further hazard - Kakrafoon is HOT, and Zaphod must make sure he gets in and out of each cavern before he is roasted alive. Once out, he can refresh himself with a well-deserved Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster.

Zaphod will refuse to leave any cavern without at least one gem in his hands, but does not have to collect them all. On successful excavation of any cavern, the gems that Zaphod has collected will be valued by a rogue Vogon jeweller (rogue, in that he *isn't* unnecessarily cruel and bureaucratic, has no desire to write terrible poetry, and has somehow escaped diabolical punishment for this on Vogsphere). It is up to you to decide which gems to go for, as some are considerably more valuable than others, and there is a range of values for each type of gem. You must then decide whether or not to venture onwards to another cavern, and will only receive a final score if Zaphod survives to fly away from Kakrafoon with all his ill-gotten gains.

Incredibly for those who know his idiosyncrasies, Zaphod has learned from his time with Trillian to be more prepared for un-hoopy situations than he once was. He has packed four portable Pan-Galactic Gargle Blasters in a Sirius Cybernetics talking Thermos flask (which is as annoying as Eddie and Talkie Toaster combined...) which can be used in an emergency if he can't get out of a cavern in time. How much his temperature drops, both using one of these, and at the end of a cavern, varies with the difficulty level.

He also found two Extra-Groovy-Awesome Devices in the Heart Of Gold's supply room. He doesn't know what they do, only that they might be helpful in some way. Though, if you've been paying proper attention to all this waffle and bunk, you will already have worked it out for yourself.

Best of luck - you'll need it (if only to not get into an unsalvageable situation, but then, I told you to keep Zaphod's greed on a tight leash).

The game was released as participant in the Crap Games Competition 2024 (C.S.S.C.G.C. 2024).

It was made by Jim Waterman in 2024.

Download here: https://taskmastersoftware.itch.io/csscgc2024

Huge playlist archive with ZX Spectrum Next software: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DKP7wRcJgS0&list=PLxOanVBhqd3sDNyPQ49hgs2jGSjqDIpWg