Game:

Ballz (1994)

Duration: 6:29

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12

I give up. I gave this game multiple chances, but I just can't do it. I only played this a few times so far and each time felt like the worst experience ever.

For those unaware, I was planning to do a guide on this one. However, I kept pushing it back multiple times because there are other games I'd rather do a guide on. From here, I'm going to talk about how I feel about this game. If you like this game, that's cool. The point of this is not to change your opinion on it. I only want to explain why I dislike it so much so I don't get asked about it again. I'll start with the best part about this game. TLDR at the bottom.

Graphics: Easily the most impressive part about this game. A 3D fighter running on a Sega Genesis at a good frame rate is pretty dang rad. If someone liked this game for that reason alone, I wouldn't blame them. There's obviously effort here and I can dig the attempt at it.

Music / Sound: Somehow better and worse than Brutal: Paws of Fury. Maybe the SNES version is better, but this game is HARD to listen to. If the voices weren't enough to drive me insane, the forgettable music and the unsatisfying hit sounds won't change much. I get that it sounds this way because it's not meant to be taken seriously, but that doesn't mean I should be running to the mute button. I could get past the sound effects if they made some bangers, but I don't even remember what the music sounds like. Rather ironic since the intro and voice lines are gonna live rent free in my head.

Gameplay: Playing to win is a joke since all you have to do is pick Divine and spam the same move over and over. Well, okay. Maybe I'll treat it like TMNT Tournament Fighters on Sega Genesis and just ignore the infinite loops. Despite me and my friend doing this for this game, we did not have a good time. Nothing felt satisfying to pull off. Despite the huge move list of the characters, plenty of them felt useless (though maybe they are secretly overpowered, so take that with a grain of salt). Having to hold Up + Back to block did not help. This is a rule I could not adapt to and it lead to matches where the best offense was the only way to win.

TLDR: This game is different, but different doesn't always mean good. Similar to Time Killers, this is a game where I cannot agree with its rules. I hate how blocking works, I don't like the hit feedback on attacks and moves, the command list is way too big, I don't want to even think about how hitboxes work, and it feels like the kind of game where you find that one move and do it endlessly. Maybe I'm wrong on that last part, but Divine (and maybe even Kronk) is enough to back up that statement.

Again, if you like this game, awesome. I just wanted to share my experience with it. It's not the worse fighting game I've played, but the fact that this probably costed $60 during its release is ridiculous. Nowadays it's easy for someone to play something like this for free and shrug it off as a decent game, but I refuse to judge it in such a way. I bought this at an arcade place for like $10-20 bucks about a year ago (don't remember the exact price). I was honestly better off buying lunch. There is a small chance I do a guide on this after Home Alone 1 + 2, but don't quote me on that.

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