Game:

Trojan (1986)

Duration: 1:54:24

20 views

2

Today was bad. Today was really, really bad. I was already dreading one of the games today, but I was hoping the other two would balance it out. They did not. In fact, one of them may very well have been worse than the one I was dreading.

Trojan: For some reason, only the Japanese ROM (Tatakai no Banka) is available in this set. This is not a good game. This is one of those arcade games that personifies being "cheap" to steal your quarters. Beyond just being difficult, it borders on impossible. You have a sword, a shield, and the ability to jump. When the game starts, it seems normal enough. Few enemy types, the standard "run toward you for melee" and the "hang back a little and throw things" types. Not too bad Even the first few bosses are pretty decent. In fact, some of the early bosses actually require a bit of tactics and reaction on your part. You can't just attack the armadillo one, you have to avoid the ball form and then attack it when it pops out. The second stage boss throws shurikens at you, but you have a shield and can try to time your shots. It's still pretty cheap and can hit you while you drop your shield to attack, but it's doable. The problem comes later, on the vertical levels (flashbacks of Section Z). There you are faced with bosses that come at you from both sides. You can't jump over enemies either, so you're just surrounded. And these bosses can do enough damage to you to kill you quickly. On the next to last level, the mini-bosses pose a particular challenge that you can overcome with a bit of finesse, jumping in to get a hit to mitigate one of theirs lets you outlast them. However, you wo;; still take a lot of damage that you can't avoid. The actual boss though is where the game becomes literally impossible as far as I can see. You can't bait one out at a time. So you are forced to fight with enemies on both sides. And these enemies can deal massage damage to you, even through shields, and they can block your attacks. They can attack you WHILE blocking your attacks, something you can't do. And they are on both sides of you so you can't even try to finesse them or the one behind you will destroy you. The most damage I was able to do even WITH rewind was 2 pops of 8 to just one of the two bosses. I do wonder if using the auto attack was part of that, but why would that even be an option if it breaks the game? Either way, this game is a big failure in my eyes.

Legendary Wings: I simply do not understand the design choices for this game. There is the standard over-head schmup portion of the game, with the usual attack and ground attack options. The ground attack takes a bit too long to 'recharge', and the crosshair can get lost in the background. Other than that, it's pretty normal. The problem though is that each stage has up to three side-scrolling sections. Really, really bad, slow side-scrolling sections. The first two even seem entirely optional. One if you get sucked into a giant face on the map, which you can just fly past. A second bonus stage from destroying one of three statues, that only gives you extra points anyway. And the final "boss" section. But those final sections are all almost exactly the same. Same enemies, same boss. Fairly cheap enemies too. They will attack you when you get within the usual range to kill them, take several hits, and are difficult to avoid. Even the bosses aren't too difficult. At least, not the one that actually fired back at me. Because there's one last really baffling design choice, and that is that the final power-up for your character gives you a weapon that one-shots anything, including the final boss. If you can keep it, of course. Nothing in this game makes sense to me, it felt like playing one of the really bad SNK games again.

Bionic Commando: I hate this game. I have always hated this game. I hated this game back when it was brand new in arcades. Played it a few times and knew the game was garbage. And for a very simple reason: It's a platformer that took required tools a platformer needs to mitigate damage away from the player in exchange for a gimmick that doesn't work very well most of the time. You can't jump. You can only shoot straight to the sides. Your gimmick is the claw hand that can be fired to the sides, up, or up at a diagonal. You use this claw to swing across, or far more frequently, climb up to the next platform. To work with that gimmick, a lot of the stages are designed to be vertical, with enemies usually above you. Shooting down at you. That you can't respond to because you can't shoot up and your claw hooks on to the floor below them. This game's only saving grace is that you continue from right where you died, even on a new quarter. But I don't know why anyone would ever want to. This game is absolutely trash.-- Watch live at https://www.twitch.tv/the_nametag

Humble Bundle Partner link:
https://www.humblebundle.com/?partner=nametag&charity=8443