Game:

Carmageddon (1997)

Duration: 7:04

1,344 views

6

N64 FANBOYS, BEHOLD.

You continuously bleat about GoldenEye, Perfect Dark, Ocarina Of Time and so many other games that you can point to fantastic reviews for, yet you refuse to speak anything about the many, MANY horrors of the N64 library. You don't even admit the existence of them.

THE ABSOLUTE FUCKING HORRORS.

This is one of said horrors.

The controls are fucking awful, the sound is akin to having some fucker gargling into your ears, and the visuals?

Get to fuck, these aren't acceptable for the N64. These would be sub-par for the PlayStation.

And what's all this dinosaur shit anyway? When I last played Carmageddon, I was running down pedestrians and zombies, not these prehistoric washouts. They don't even look like fucking dinosaurs.

STOP CENSORING VIDEOGAMES, YOU BASTARDS.

fffff

You know what? Don't bother watching this shit, because this game is unbelievably dull. Even if the ending is somewhat amusing, the gameplay is so mind-numbing, you'll forget your own name and suffer from an unfathomable urge to eat dishwasher tablets.

Absolute bollocks.

(I did indeed record this at half-size; I'll be damned if I'm having this pile of shit take up 150MB of space.)

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