Game:

The Simpsons Game (2007)

Duration: 2:37:39

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Originally recorded: March 7, 2021
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And I'm already at the third game of the year in the third month of the year. It seems like March is typically the month where things begin to align like that, at least as of late. Like, if I'm really lucky, maybe I'll start the second game in February... but considering how I've started with turn-based JRPGs for the past two years, getting things aligned like that in March has been a good thing. Indeed, the sooner I get through the main line-up of games, the more "bonus streams" I can pull. Though, I must admit, this year, that prospect feels more like a sword of Damocles due to the horrors that await me.

But I've stalled long enough. This time, I'm finally playing through The Simpsons Game, specifically the PS2 version. Obviously, seventh-gen emulation is still in the process of being rendered playable and without a PC release (thanks EA!), I've decided to resort to the PS2 version, which is basically the scaled-down Wii version without motion controls. Honestly, for as much as I blame the PS2 for turning the sixth generation of video games into a barren hellscape that we still have yet to escape from (and that's probably not even in the top ten of my hottest takes), I am still impressed by its cockroachesque survival ability in the wake of the seventh generation. Whether by upscaling games that were otherwise PSP exclusives or piggybacking on the Wii's success mandating lesser ports of certain marquee titles, this thing absolutely refused to die. And don't get me wrong: I have the apparently rare ability to respect something without liking it... and the PS2's end of days has earned that kind of respect from me.

As for the game itself, well, I'll just say that this playthrough probably isn't going to live up to its title. Like, it's not a bad game necessarily. The various gimmicks of each Simpson are unique, though admittedly, I think Marge might be my favorite of the bunch... which is a sentence I never thought I'd utter in any context. But when a man who used to use the handle "KI Simpson" admits that he dropped the game around the second level, there are clearly some issues. Right now, I'd put it at a "7"... and I mean a REAL 7. Not one of those ones that game journos hand out when a game is hot garbage, but they paid for six months worth of advertising. The controls and physics are janky and while it's not fair to judge the entire game by one of its more scaled back incarnations, KI has been implying that this was a common problem across ALL iterations.

Oh, and also, we all think that Dari is Homer Simpson... but I'll delve more into that next time.

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